JESS: Delivery.

RORY: What are you doing here?

JESS: Well, Luke figured since youre along tonight that maybe you wouldnt have any food in the house, so he sent over a care package.

RORY: I dont need a care package. I ordered food from Sandeeps.

JESS: Really? Planning on burning down the house afterwards?

RORY: Jess.

JESS: The only way to kill the smell. Where should I put this? [walks into house]

RORY: Well. . .

JESS: Kitchen?

RORY: Um. . .sure.

[cut to kitchen]

RORY: God, how much food is in there? This could feed twelve.

JESS: Excuse me, Ive seen you eat.

RORY: Fine, six.

JESS: Yeah, well, he wanted you taken care of. He wasnt sure how long your mom was gonna be gone for.

RORY: Just tonight.

JESS: Oh, he didnt know that.

RORY: Well, now you can tell him.

JESS: I will.

RORY: So how come Caesar didnt bring this over?

JESS: I volunteered.

RORY: Why?

JESS: Just wanted to get out of the construction zone. Theres nothing but banging and yelling. That place gives me a headache.

RORY: Oh.

JESS: Why did you think I wanted to come over here and see you?

RORY: No.

JESS: Just needed some quiet.

RORY: Fine.

JESS: That is all.

RORY: Got it.

JESS: Clear my head.

RORY: I understand.

JESS: So, arent you gonna eat?

RORY: Eventually.

JESS: It gets cold fast.

RORY: I can heat it up.

JESS: Reheated French fries really suck.

RORY: Hm, they do suck.

JESS: Yeah, so, eat.

RORY: Okay, I will. Youre still standing there.

JESS: I know. You didnt give me a tip.

RORY: You want money?

JESS: No, Ill take a fry though.

RORY: Okay, yeah, have as much as you want.

JESS: Okay, great. [takes off jacket]

RORY: What are you doing?

JESS: Getting ready to eat.

RORY: Youre staying?

JESS: Didnt you just invite me?

RORY: No, I -.

JESS: No, you told me to have all I wanted. That sounded invitation-like.

RORY: You wanna stay here and eat?

JESS: Beats being at Lukes.

RORY: But .

PARIS: [walks in from living room] I cant find my flashcards.

JESS: I didnt know you had company.

RORY: This is Paris. We were just studying.

JESS: Huh.

PARIS: Dont worry, I was just leaving. If you find my flashcards, call me, okay?

RORY: No.

PARIS: What?

RORY: Stay for dinner.

PARIS: But I thought. . .

RORY: We have a ton of food, and we can go over the notes more later.

PARIS: Youre sure?

RORY: Positive.

PARIS: Is that mac and cheese?

RORY: It sure is.

PARIS: I love mac and cheese.

RORY: Great.

PARIS: Im not allowed to have mac and cheese.

RORY: Splurge. Come on Paris, stay.

PARIS: Do you have a twenty-four hour pharmacy just in case I have an allergic reaction to something?

RORY: Believe it or not, we do.

PARIS: Okay, can I borrow your phone?

RORY: Its by the door.

[Paris walks away]

JESS: Interesting.

RORY: What is?

JESS: You think we need a chaperone?

RORY: No, I dont.

JESS: You just invited one.

RORY: Im just being polite. Paris is alone tonight and you yourself just said we have enough food for six.

JESS: With me around, its down to four.

RORY: With Paris around, its down to two.

JESS: Works out well.

RORY: I think so.

PARIS: [on phone] Hola, es Paris. Voy a comer la cena de cas de Rory. Hay mucho mac and cheese!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

PARIS: A tragic waste of paper.

JESS: I cant believe you just said that.

PARIS: Well, its true, the Beats writing was completely self-indulgent. I have one word for Jack Kerouac edit.

JESS: It was not self-indulgent. The Beats believed in shocking people, stirring things up.

PARIS: They believed in drugs, booze, and petty crime.

RORY: Well, then you can say that they exposed you to a world you wouldnt have otherwise known. Isnt that what great writings all about?

PARIS: That was not great writing. That was the National Enquirer of the fifties.

JESS: Youre cracked.

PARIS: Typical guy response. Worship Kerouac and Bukowski, God forbid youd pick up anything by Jane Austen.

JESS: Hey, Ive read Jane Austen.

PARIS: You have?

JESS: Yeah, and I think she wouldve liked Bukowski.

PARIS: What are you doing?

JESS: Salt and pepper dip. Only way to eat a fry.

PARIS: Really?

RORY: Its fast food gospel.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

JESS: I cant get into poetry. Its kind of like, geez, just say it already, were dying here.

RORY: Wow, you know, I just noticed the time, and its getting really late.

JESS: Its seven oclock.

RORY: I know, but Paris and I still have a lot more studying to do. Jess, please thank Luke for me. It was really nice of him.

JESS: Who was on the phone?

RORY: No one.

JESS: No one wouldnt happen to be heading over here now, would he?

RORY: Jess.

PARIS: Whats going on?

RORY: Nothing.

JESS: Deans on his way over and Rory doesnt want him to find me here.

RORY: Why?

JESS: Yeah, why?

RORY: You know why.

JESS: Were just eating dinner.

RORY: Jess, Im asking you as a friend, just please leave now.

JESS: You really want me to go?

RORY: I really wanna avoid a fight with Dean.

JESS: Okay, Im going.

RORY: Thank you.

JESS: Ow!

RORY: What?

JESS: Ooh! I just twisted my ankle. I better go lie down.

RORY: Jess!

JESS: God, youre no fun when youre tense. Are you sure you want me to go? Cause maybe this whole thing can be solved between me and Dean if we just sat down and had a little heart to heart. He can tell me his issues, Ill tell him mine.

RORY: Jess!

JESS: I promise Ill speak slowly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RORY: Dean, Jess just came by to bring me some food.

JESS: From Lukes.

RORY: He wanted to make sure I ate.

JESS: Luke did.

RORY: Right, Luke did.

JESS: Personally, I could care less if she eats.

RORY: Yeah, true, he could care less.

JESS: I see you brought a little something, too. Is that ice cream? Thats so nice. A tiny little ice cream package just big enough for two. Hey, are you guys gonna feed each other cause thats just so darn cute. Oops. Youre doing that towering over me thing. Huh. I tell you, youve really got that down. It helps that youre twelve feet tall, but this Frankenstein scowl really adds to the whole .

RORY: Jess.

JESS: Okay, Im going. Look, man, I really was just dropping off some food, so dont get all West Side Story on me, okay?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RORY: Huh, interesting.

JESS: Hey, you wanna pay?

RORY: I dont think Luke knew anything about the food last night.

JESS: Thatll be twelve-fifty.

RORY: Which means you lied about why you came over.

JESS: I dont have any quarters. Im gonna have to give you nickels.

RORY: Now why would you lie about something like that?

JESS: Heres your change. Come again soon.

RORY: You wanted to come over.

JESS: I have to get back to work.

RORY: Youre squirming. Ive never seen you squirm. Its entertaining.

JESS: Oh yeah?

RORY: Yeah.